Self discipline. We all need it, but often times we have a conflicted relationship with the concept. Is discipline fraught with negative connotations for you? Many people are afraid of the idea of discipline because what goes hand and hand with the idea of discipline is the fear of not measuring up or failing to meet the mark that you've set for yourself.

Self discipline is essential for success in almost any endeavor. To transform one's self, it requires moving beyond habituated behaviors that we often are pretty invested in not giving up. Discipline helps us to cut a new groove and develop new, healthier habits that serve our over all well being better. Discipline also can help us to complete projects and move forward towards our highest goals for ourselves. So it's really helpful to think of discipline as your friend and not some nasty teacher from middle school that wants to just boss you around for no good reason. I have a pretty good relationship to self discipline, so I'd like to share some tips that have really helped me to stay on task with my personal goals for myself.

1. Do your best. You can't do any better than that.
2. Set REASONABLE goals for yourself. If you make the task too large, you are more likely to get overwhelmed or feel defeated before you even begin.
3. You may not achieve 100% of what you have set out to do on a daily basis. Some people do really well by setting absolute goals for them selves,(particularly when trying to overcoming a habit,) while others do better by doing things in a more incremental fashion.  For some things, I do better being incremental about it, and some things 100% is the best choice. Figure out which is going to work best for you.
4. Look within. Check in with all aspects of yourself and try to get as much of yourself on board with your goals as you can. Most people have an "inner saboteur" who will attempt to thwart your goals for yourself. Go have a talk with this aspect of yourself. Find out what its motivation is, and do what you can to relieve its fears, Give it other healthy
choices, and give it the love it needs to loosen its grip on its version of reality.
5. Stay conscious! Negative habits generally happen when we "go to sleep" on what we know to be true. This takes a certain vigilance to over come, as well as a keen desire to stay on track. Being disassociative or checked out is the crack that the old habit comes back in from.
6. Have an accountability buddy. Sometimes it helps to have someone else who you check in with regarding the shifts you are after. Once I had an accountability partner regarding daily spiritual discipline. Our deal was, if either of us missed a day, we would have to send a $15 -$20 gift to the other person. It worked like a charm. Now you don't have to have a "fee" like we did, but at least committing to call when you miss your mark can help keep you conscious and on track.
7. Reminders. It helps to have them. Many times people have a hard time staying on track, because they simply forget to do what needs to be done. It can take a little while to get a new habit anchored into a daily repertoire. Notes on mirrors, a task manager set on the
computer, help from friends or even something like hassleme (http://www.hassleme.co.uk/) can help remind you about going to the gym, taking your vitamins, or whatever else you need some reminding about.
8. Be compassionate with your self. Know the difference between compassion and coddling. Compassion means being loving with your self as stuff comes up. It doesn't mean giving in to the part of you that is upset about the changes. It's OK to have emotions about things. Just
notice them and stay present with what's coming up. Beating yourself up for not measuring up just creates more problems.

May you find the inner strength you need to align yourself with what is best for your soul. May you have all the energy and conviction your need to act on your highest aspirations for your life.